"Dissapearing Man"

Posted: Sun Feb 02, 2003 12:24 pm

4 star daydreams EP will go to album status, lets critique it. So far the vocals are too loud..but critique the musicianship and lyrics. These are engineered by the artists so we are working on them!!!

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Track: <a href='http://www.nowhereradio.com/artists/album?aid=1573&alid=126#9861'>Dissapearing Man</a>
Artist: <a href='http://www.nowhereradio.com/artists/?aid=1573'>Bandstand Mastering</a>
<em>4.6MB - 2:51</em>
Available in hi-fi or lo-fi streaming and download.
<a href='http://www.nowhereradio.com/artists/album?aid=1573&alid=126#9861'>The track is available here</a>

<em>Critique submission system compliments of <a href='http://www.nowhereradio.com'>NoWhereRadio.com</a></em>

Posted: Sun Feb 02, 2003 1:07 pm

Just listened to the track twice. I am in no way a pro, so take my words with a fistfull of salt Wink

I'd say that this song, from a 'tone' perspective is not very cohesive. The guitars sound great, like maybe a less 'finished' version of that classic early-mid 90s grunge tone with a bit of metallica thrown in. I'd say the guitars are a bit thin for my taste, but they definitely work.

The drums are well recorded, but don't match the guitars, again, in my opinion. The way the guitars and drums interact makes the clip sound like maybe it is a manufacturer demo for either an amp or a drum kit. They are a little reminiscent of the STP/AIC drum sound but sound just too clean. Would like to hear more of a dirty sound on the drums, since the guitar is dirty.

I didn't get a feel for the bass guitar at all. Definitely playing a supporting role, which is good, but would like more character. Again, makes it sound like the clip is demoing an electric guitar amp. Especially when the guitar solo kicks in.

The instrumental performances are quite solid. Certainly, everybody playing on the track has a good command of his or her instrument. The electric guitar solo is precise, and the rhythm is very tight.

As far as the song goes, I can't help but be reminded of a Rocktron guitar demo. The song sounds as though it was written by somebody with a great command of theory who knows a lot about different styles of music, but has never really immersed themselves in that grunge rock scene. I guess what I'm trying to say is that the music seems secondary to the tone, as if showcasing what a "90s grunge" preset might sound like on a pod pro or something like that.

The vocals are too high in the mix for me to appreciate them. There is that Alice In Chains vocal harmony thing going on, but they don't seem to mesh well with either eachother, or the instrumental mix. Again, too 'planned out' sounding for my personal (and I stress that this is my personal reaction) tastes.

I don't know if I have the right words to describe what I mean, but it sounds like the people who wrote it thought "I got an idea! Let's write a grunge song!" as opposed to playing together, with this emerging as 'their sound.' The melody and lyrics don't do anything for me. The pitch, etc. is spot on (like I said, everyone definitely sounds professional), but I feel as though there isn't a lot of authenticity here.

Besides the term "dissapearing man", I didn't catch any of the other lyrics besides "crazy." For me, nothing about this song embodies the phrase "crazy." "Very well executed," maybe, but there is none of the insanity, desperation, or just guts that I love about bands from that alternative/grunge generation of rock.

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 6:44 pm

I'm sorry man, I didn't like any of it. The lyrics left me wondering what the hell you were talking about, "I'm a rock on which she can bend? On which you can depend?" Neither seems worth the effort.
You had that heavy descending guitar thing that just didn't come across heavy enough in the recording. If you were aiming at really bad, 80's, struggly, heavy metal, you hit the mark.

dan.

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 7:29 pm

Dan, you are the Simon to my Paula Abdoul Wink

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 7:33 pm

"she likes to think that i'm a good man... like a rock on which she can depend ... ooohhhh then i'm gone again ... disappearing man" for those who want to know what is being said on "Disappearing Man"...

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 7:38 pm

On a song like this, I'd rather not have to read those rather simple lyrics to understand them. I'm not sure this song hits the mark.

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 7:45 pm

great answer...would you please be so honest on some of my other songs ... please ... you would be suprised how hard it is to get an honest review ... i'd rather have a bad one than none at all... thanks... Smile

http://www.nowhereradio.com/artists/album?aid=1573&alid=126#9854 ... this is a guitar song i would like you to hear...called parker test

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 7:59 pm

Jimab,

I really appreciate that you're so open to criticism! I like your playing on this track- you're obviously a very capable player, I just think you may be applying yourself in the wrong areas.

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 8:13 pm

battle angel... i would almost pay you (best intentions ) to tell me what direction to go ... i have many tracks (100 + )to let you hear ...

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 8:24 pm

Well it's your music and your art, I wouldn't presume to tell anyone what to do! I can definitely give you advice on anything you'd like me to hear. I won't mask my opinions, that's for sure. Again, I have to say that I am not as experienced as guys like Bill, but I am a little worried that he would think about letting something like this track (dissapearing man) be released- If your intention is to 'make it' in any capacity and not just have fun that is.

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 8:38 pm

Most of Ab's stuff needs to be re recorded, this stage of feeling and finding is one reason I told him to Join up. He needs constructive critism and Ab and his guys are working in a producers environment with a project studio. Once things get to a level everyone seems happy with is when we get serious and record. That is when my production talent will kick in as well as we have worked one album that really was a smoker. Ab being 700 miles away from me and just now getting on line (with a horrible computer soon to be replaced) is the start. Definitely he NEEDS your input to see where all these one takers can go. I am happy he is here and I am most happy you guys are responding to his tracks. Ab is a graduate from GIT and is a serious player, writer. Getting his guys on "page" and getting something tangeable is the stage they are in. I applauld all the responses. He needs to know from serveral perspectives and appreciates them.

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 8:43 pm

I'll help in any way I can =)

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 8:55 pm

Thanks Man!

More AB below
Click on More AB, then once there it is deep linked with right click.
..right click save target as for links, they still work!

<img src="http://images.mp3.com/mp3s/8/resources/188/397/files/1883977.jpg" alt=" - " />

More AB

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 9:08 pm

What exactly is AB? Is this all Jimab's stuff?

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2003 9:10 pm

ja....but only the first few songs I recorded..he wants to get back in the pocket...that stuff was in 97

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