Guys, not that I'm trying to get out of more long answers here, but I'm a little short on time these days so I'm first going to send you to a couple of older posts that may help answer some of your questions - then, after you've read through those if you could re-state your questions I'd be glad to give them a whirl.
Keep in mind through all this, that you're NOT, repeat NOT, dealing with an experienced, certified (certifiable, maybe :=)Acoustical Engineer, or even close - I've done a couple of rooms, one for myself and one for a friend (long distance) after building one for myself several (about 16) years ago that turned out semi-OK acoustically, but crappy for sound proofing.
Since that time, I've been studying acoustic theory off and on for the last 15 years or so. You will note, however, that in the second thread I'm linking to, that I asked for and got some feedback from an experienced studio designer and recording engineer from Australia, Mr. John Sayers. From what John commented, I'm apparently interpreting what I've studied fairly well. Bottom line - Caveat Emptor (and, since it's free, what does that tell ya?)
Anyway, I'll not pretend to know something if I've not read it and at least proven it to myself satisfactorily - so, with that, here are a few pages to check out that may answer or ask more questions - please read them, then re-state whatever questions you have left (or, if I've scared you off, spend your own decade or so doing what I've done, your choice) Here they are, then...
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Mike, on your ceiling STC question, click on the following link, then click on construction (sidebar), then scroll to the BOTTOM of the page. That's what I would do, with maybe only two layers on the RC depending on what the rest of your barrier between the upstairs world is like. By that, I mean that it's pointless to build a 60 db wall and have a poorly fitted, hollow core door leading up un-enclosed steps to the half-sealed door into the kitchen - remember the "weakest link" syndrome...
Happy reading Mike,Mark; I'll check back in a day or two for any residual questions - and remember, I don't know $*^t... Steve