Barely Alive - Grunge Song

Joined
Apr 21, 2015
Hi all,

Wrote and recorded this 90's grunge vibe song over a weekend. Feedback most welcome:

https://soundcloud.com/jonathan-linton-3%2Fbarely-alive
BARELY ALIVE
(Words by Jonathan Linton, Music by Jonathan Linton)

I’m a machine
Help everyone
I’ve always been
The unfortunate son
So leave me behind
With my despair
I have resigned
To go nowhere

Body is strong
But the mind is gone
Hope deprived
I’m barely alive
Each time
I find
A lifeline
It’s deprived
Yeah, I’m barely alive

I’ve been accused
I’ve been abused
They even hide
When they’re amused
Preyed upon
Future foregone
Ambition gone
But doomed to live on

Body is strong
But the mind is gone
Hope deprived
I’m barely alive
Each time
I find
A lifeline
It’s deprived
Yeah, I’m barely alive

SOLO

Body is strong
But the mind is gone
Hope deprived
I’m barely alive
Each time
I find
A lifeline
It’s deprived
Yeah, I’m barely alive
I’m barely alive
I’m barely alive
Barely alive
Barely alive
 

kmetal

Kyle P. Gushue
Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 21, 2009
Good tune. Gtrs might be a bit loud, in line with a 90s mix where gtrs were in front of the snare. I like the cavernous drums. I hear a lot of competition in tge 3-6k range between gtrs, vocals, and snare. Could just be this phone, but it seems like a little bit of clearing in that area may be less abrasive but still rock.
 
Joined
Apr 21, 2015
Good tune. Gtrs might be a bit loud, in line with a 90s mix where gtrs were in front of the snare. I like the cavernous drums. I hear a lot of competition in tge 3-6k range between gtrs, vocals, and snare. Could just be this phone, but it seems like a little bit of clearing in that area may be less abrasive but still rock.

Hey Kyle,

Thanks for the compliments and feedback. There is some wisdom in your critique. In the meantime, I made a remix because some of the mix balance was off to me and also based on some other critique as well. Here it is - I hope this addresses your critique:

https://soundcloud.com/jonathan-linton-3%2Fbarely-alive-v2
 
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