Discussion in 'Drums' started by vinniesrs, May 25, 2003.

  1. vinniesrs

    vinniesrs Active Member

    May 12, 2003
    Does anyone know the difference between a drummer and a large pizza?........................................................
    A large pizza can feed a family of four. Har dee har har.

    [ May 26, 2003, 11:36 AM: Message edited by: Kurt Foster ]
  2. mixman77

    mixman77 Guest

    I love when they feel they need to kick the kick while we're placing the mic in it. Or better yet, cRaCk the snare right in our ear as if we think that's cool or are gonna say 'wow man, good snare sound' haha... 'I needed to hear it that close and LOUD'. You got to love drum techs, they know how it's done, thank Heavens.


  3. vinniesrs

    vinniesrs Active Member

    May 12, 2003
    Hey Kevin, relax a bit man. Drummers are quite useful.

    You can always tell when the stage is level because he drools out of Both sides of his mouth.
  4. falkon2

    falkon2 Well-Known Member

    Mar 17, 2003
    The next time that happens, freeze for a couple of seconds, then take off your shirt and jump around while shouting "WHEEEE" deliriously. Sure fire way to prevent something you don't like from ever happening again.

    Believe me, it worked for me.
  5. dopk

    dopk Guest

    I use earplugs when I mike a drumkit.

  6. Kurt Foster

    Kurt Foster Well-Known Member

    Jul 2, 2002
    77 Sunset Lane.
    Did you hear about the guitar player that locked his keys in the band van? It took four hours to get the drummer out! :D :D :D Bada-Bump!
  7. realdynamix

    realdynamix Well-Known Member

    Feb 23, 2001
    :) I know an engineer that finds the sweet spot on the kick with his bare foot, he rotates the foot around the front head till he finds the magic place, and places a mic there. And it sounds great! Different strokes, don't always need ears I guess.

  8. shaneperc

    shaneperc Active Member

    May 25, 2003
    Here's my favorite (this coming from a drummer):

    What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend?

  9. Kurt Foster

    Kurt Foster Well-Known Member

    Jul 2, 2002
    77 Sunset Lane.
    How can you spot a drummer?
    He is the guy who hangs around with musicians.. Bada Bump-bump! Splash!
  10. RobyG

    RobyG Guest

    What's the most common phrase uttered by drummers in L.A.?
    "...Would you like fries with that?"

    But seriously, if I wasn't a musician I would have become a drummer.
  11. rpowell

    rpowell Guest

    just can't resist..

    how do you know a drummer's at your door?
    the knock speeds up..


    he never knows when to come in
  12. TonyM

    TonyM Guest

    resistance is futile...

    What did the drummer get on his I.Q. test?


    OUCH :D
  13. vinniesrs

    vinniesrs Active Member

    May 12, 2003
    What's the difference between a polka drummer, and a skunk on the side of the road?

    The skunk was probably on his way to a gig!(nyuk nyuk nyuk snorrrf :s: )
  14. dbluefield

    dbluefield Guest

    What's the difference between a recording engineer and a mutual fund?

    The mutual fund eventually matures and earns money.

    If you throw a producer and engineer off a tall building, who'll hit the ground first?

    Who cares?

    What do you have when a group of engineers are up to their necks in wet concrete?

    Not enough concrete

  15. Kurt Foster

    Kurt Foster Well-Known Member

    Jul 2, 2002
    77 Sunset Lane.
    I thought it was there were skid marks in front of the skunk!

    How many producer/engineers does it take to mix a record?
    Ten. One to do it and nine to stand around muttering "I could have done it better."
  16. Axeman32

    Axeman32 Guest

    Drummer says . . . Don't be afraid to bring the drums forward in the mix, nobody listens to the words anyway!

    Drummer Dude. . . The bass and the drums are the BACK bone of the band. Gee man I though it was as solo instrument. Fader man. . . can you turn those vocals down I can't hear my new china cymbal
  17. Don Schenk

    Don Schenk Active Member

    Jan 10, 2003
    Home Page:

    Doesn't Really Understand Music
  18. Rod Gervais

    Rod Gervais Active Member

    Jun 8, 2003
    Central Village, CT
    Home Page:
    Ok - OK - i have been avoiding this thread like the plague.... but now i have to jump in (see - my mouth is wide open - plenty of room for my feet)

    Drummers of the world rise up and unite...... lol

    what i love most about my band mates is that they realize the value of a drummer....

    hell you got someone on the boat who you can use for chum if the sharks come.

    Some one you can throw at the drunk in the bar to give you enough time to make an escape - (that'll teach him to let you kiss another man's wife)

    Seriously - some of us are pro's -

    I have never even touched my drums (or sat behind them for that matter) while mics were being set - never touched one until the tech asked - and then only what he asked for -

    I spent years learning to play guitar - bass - piano and studing music theory and composition - just so i could better understand my bandmates - write better songs - know how to structure my instrument with theirs

    I am presently studying pedal steel and violin so we can expand our music to new levels -

    all of that - and to think i could have just stood behind the skunk and been saved by the virtue of his skid marks......

    Seriously - i hope you all take this as tongue in cheek - i laugh more every time i visit this thread.......

    Besides - we have more polished jokes about you than you could ever imagine....... we meet every tuesday evening for drinks - and share the new ones........ join us somme time - it's a riot.....

    Happy hunting

  19. Rod Gervais

    Rod Gervais Active Member

    Jun 8, 2003
    Central Village, CT
    Home Page:
    Actually Don, you're talking about an inanimate object there buddy....... although i believe it was George Lennon - in reference to Ringo Starr who said the famous line which we all remember:


    Doesn't Really Understand Music Much Eleanor Rigby"

    Sheesh....... if you're gonna use a quote the least you could do is get it right.

    LOL....... :D

    Rod the left handed drummer.......
  20. Tore Nylund

    Tore Nylund Guest

    Well...what's the last words of the drummer in a band?
    "-Hey, guys... why not try one of my songs?"

    Why are drum-machines better than drummers?
    - They will keep a steady beat and they won't f*ck your girlfriend.

    Or as they say in the movie "Still Crazy":
    "If it's true what say that women are from Venus and men are from Mars... then drummer must come from Pluto"
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