Very nice piece.

Turn your levels down a lot more! Keep your levels no hotter than -18 at the hottest parts. Don't even think about being close the red, EVER! Your recording level sounds too hot.
It also sounds like you have a cable from your pickup or electronics inside the guitar that is vibrating from the low strings. Fix that ( tape it or tie it somehow) and re record this with my recommendations and post back.

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A music box? You mean those little things we used to wind up? If that's the sound you are going for, I think you need to do this is a two-stage recording? A music box is rather small and has a very small and intimate sound. That would require some heavy filtering and most likely some serious compression. Whereas the rest of your song, it opens up and turns into something much bigger. That's where you wouldn't want all of that equalization. I also think that audiokid might be right about his observations?You might be pushing the level of little too hard?

It's close but no cigar.
Mx. Remy Ann David

Nice guitar pickup. I'm hearing a bunch of compression at home, almost undoubtably from youtube itself. the encoding too. Try some ambient mics. The fingerpicking parts have quite a bit of note sustain as well as attack, i'd maybe turn the release down a bit on the compressor.

Beautiful piece. I feel (harmonically) you project the feeling of a music box very effectively - for using a guitar to do it with, of course.

Dynamic pieces like this are often sort of a white whale and strategic use of a compressor can certainly help. In the past I've used a simple Pro VLA with the ratio set to infinity and the makeup gain at like +3dB. Purely for effect. You can easily reamp the piece through an outboard compressor for this effect and bring the effected track up using automated volume during the quiet sections of the piece. Or, of course use a plugin.

The piece obviously means a lot to you emotionally so don't give up. To be honest with you, I enjoyed it just the way it is.

I forgot to add that while I understand the above recommendation to not track at levels above -18dB, this is usually a rule of thumb (in a 24 bit environment) when your song will be comprised of multiple tracks and instruments. But this is a solo acoustic guitar piece which gives you the opportunity to track at higher levels. Even as hot as -6db or -3dB peak you'll be just fine.

You're not recording a project for Warner records or anything like that, right? (y)

Thanks a lot for the responses guys, i really appreciate your kind words and advice. (especially taking the time to do it)

I will certainly be trying out these things on future pieces and will post back the results to see if there could be any more improvements :)